Now That’s What I Call a Bad Idea: Volume 1

This is the first in a series of lists. Enjoy.

  • Trying to catch scissors in your mouth
  • Gluing your lips together
  • Sending threatening messages to the president
  • Pearl Harbor II: Onward to Korea!
  • Frosted Flakes: now with free ninja kit, complete with two throwing stars
  • Telling your wife what you really think of her mother
  • Cybernetic ass implants with auto-jiggle
  • Breaking up with someone by changing your MySpace relationship status (true story!)
  • Revolving toothbrush holder
  • Midget/Elephantitis porn
  • Nuclear go-cart
  • Gold-miner’s milk: now with potassium cyanide
  • Keep out Old Man Winter with an Old Navy Asbestos pullover!
  • Pearl Harbor III: Peace in the Middle East